We've been asking my son what he wants for his twentieth birthday, Dec. 2. Yesterday, as we sat in the den during a break from his guitar playing, he told me: He would like a new video game set. And his diaries.
"My diaries. Is that okay?"
"Ummmmm. . . . " I answered, and sat there stunned. My husband had stepped out of the room prior to this and all I could do was stare at him in disbelief.
"Wow. I don't know. . . . I . . . let me think about it, okay? I mean, probably, sure, but let me think about it?"
I always assumed I'd know when it was time to turn over the diaries. I assumed it would be my decision, and one day, I'd just know in my gut it was time, and I'd say, "Son, here are your diaries," and maybe he'd want them, maybe he couldn't care less.
I never imagined that he would ask me. I never imagined an answer. And why am I hesitating? Why don't I just say yes? Why did the question feel like a punch in the gut? Will I say yes? It's Nov. 26. I have less than a week to recover from the question. . . and decide.