KEITH (Clinical Psychologist, early 30's)
What’s the matter? . . . Again?
(Rushing to window)
He’s going to steal every last crumb! How did he --? That feeder was guaranteed to keep squirrels off!
(Banging on window)
Hey! Get off my feeder, you bully! You tyrant! You big, fat pig! I’ll get you yet, you trespasser!
Hand me that candle! . . . I’m going to teach him a lesson! I’ll get rid of him for good!
(Aims candle out window)
. . . Don’t worry. I have perfect aim!
Damn! Quick! Hand me another candle! I never miss twice!
Take that you bullying son of a -- Ha-ha! Gotcha! That’s the last we’ll see of him!
No, I did not. I just grazed him. Just scared him, that’s all.
It can’t be! Of course he’s all right. It’s just a sprain. He’s so devious, he’s probably faking. He’s trying to arouse your sympathy so he can come back and rob us with impunity tomorrow! . . . See? There he goes! . . .
Copyright 2003 by Kelly DuMar. All rights Reserved. Published by Smith&Kraus.